June 20, 2008

Italian Spiderman Movie - Episode 5

Hands up whoever thinks motorbikes are the sexy rebel cowboys of the vehicle world. I count no less than 1 billion hands. The vote is unanimous; motorbikes are indeed one of the coolest creations man has ever pieced together out of metal, rubber and pure unbridled machismo. Motorbikes are like a mustache, (stay with me here...) they are fairly pointless, only really fun for one person - or two if you like living dangerously - and generally give the rider an air of complete superiority. I say 'rider' and not 'rider/wearer' because if the mustache is correct, you're really just part of IT, and not the other way around. If I had a real (post-pubescent) mustache, I'd ride that thing straight down a tiger's throat and burst out the tip of his tail, and I'd do it EVERY SINGLE DAY.

Italian Spiderman, Episode 5.

To all those people who refer to this scene by saying "wow you guys must have been on acid or something when you made this," I strongly urge that you find some good LSD, take it, and then try even handling your own TV remote properly, let alone a huge camera/lighting/green-screen/sound recordist equipment and giant motorbikes. If you somehow manage to compile a film of anything other than 16 minutes of your lounge room floor followed by a short muffled scream followed by cut to black, edit it up, add some sound, whack some titles and credits on your shiny new opus and send it to me. I will post it* on The Mantis' Quill. The gauntlet has been thrown down. Eat it with milk.


Introducing Goblin and Gino. See if you can guess which is which. Go on.

Who are they? What do they want? When is now? Who is what?
All I know is that Corey and I should live our entire lives in these costumes. I'm wearing mine right now. I'll give Corey a call.

Also, Capitano Maximum and his MaxiMen

Do you recognize the men under those henchmasks? If you do, GOOD FOR YOU! If you don't, how can your eyes be working well enough to read this text? So many questions.

One last note: You see purple smoke, you get the hell out of there Carl.


*no I won't.

June 14, 2008

Italian Spiderfan-art 2: the sequel; of the Dynasty Chronicles.

Notice the trend of epic, over-the-top, literary-based saga films being churned out by the katwillions as of the past 5 or 6 years? Nothing, it seems, can exist without obligatory sequels anymore. If something has one, it must have two and therefore three. What a crazy western world we live in. Are there no new ideas? Could it be that? OR is it just that the best ideas EVER have been created, given to the world in positively manageable bundles, and people just want more of those ideas in particular? Whether good or bad, being a part of the quiet and not-so-quiet revolution going on under the surface of the world's craziness at this juncture in time is something for us all to be very excited about. Music that would never be able to gain an audience in the past can now be heard, critiqued and absorbed easily by tens, hundreds, millions, katwillions. Film can be made and exposed out from under the shadow of the great and glorious Hollywood. In general, human art can be now circulated with almost the greatest of ease, so why try to control the raging river, when we can just direct the flow as it passes by us?

And thus I present MORE Italian SpiderFan-Art:

This was officially the first piece of Italian Spiderfan Art. In internet World 4000 Land, this pic was posted eons ago. Which in real-world, is about, I don't know...4 months maybe? Yeah? As 'old' as it is, it is fantastic, and the artist who created it is a dude of the highest order.

Check his other world out at

If you'd like to see your alrugo-related masterpieces (or simple doodles) posted up on this blog, you might as well send them over, and If they are awesome enough in any way, I shall endeavor to find the perfect place for them. LIKE THE FIREPLACE. Or the blog itself. Y'never know. (...doodles....)

June 13, 2008

Italian Spiderman Movie - Episode 4

Welcome to ExpositionLand. I, as mayor of this fine city, bid you a safe passage through our occasionally dangerous terrain of intrigue and explanation. Did I mention I am also a scientist? That's right, mayor AND scientist. Watch out ladies, I'll inform you that not getting enough sliced ham can cause cancer, then raise your taxes, ALL IN ONE DATE.

A quick scientific equation;
Italian Spiderman + Science / babes x old men - the smell =

Italian Spiderman Episode 4

SCIENTASTIC! Now sit back, relax and be gleeful in the notion that you now know what the film is about plot-wise.
Also, I should probably start saying - just for all you animal lovers out there - no animals were harmed in the making
of this scene. Most went blind though. Who knew playful eye-gouging affected animals?


Movie Poster: Professor Bernardi intensely doing the sciences

Actor Assembly Photo: The Dude, The Dr, The Dame. Triple D

Franco, Carmine e Caitlin
Photograph by Lucy Spartalis

Keep your eyes open and your ears free from cats, Italian Spiderfans!
Episode 5 hits you like a mass of bones and meat in the shape of a fist next week, June 19th!

June 05, 2008

Italian Spiderman - Episode 3

Do you ever lucid dream? Do you ever realise that you're dreaming whilst under the control of your subconscious? Some people achieve this point of enlightenment every single night, while for others, becoming lucid during REM sleep is a rare delight. However often this happens to you, one can not deny the incredible mixture of euphoria and excitement such a situation provides. With enough practice and training, one can basically take complete control of their own subconscious and make the dream world obey their command, creating an existential utopia to frolic and dance around for even the briefest of moments.
What would your dreamworld be like? Hmmm? Perhaps you don't know. Perhaps all that power is too much for you. Perhaps you need a helping hand...

For the next 3 minutes, 7 seconds, we present to you, your own personal DREAMTOPIA, courtesy of Alrugo.

I can now say with the utmost confidence that what you just witnessed, is at LEAST 200% better than any dream you've had in the last forever. Am I right? You bet your sweet bippy I am. They don't call me Michael Crisci: Dream Master for nothing! Or for anything. Or at all.


Fun Fact 1: This whole episode and another future episode were shot on Hindmarsh Island, South Australia, at a place known only as The Shack. It was hot that day. Very hot. Especially for dudes in red skivvies and green wetsuits.

Step One: The original production design of Coccodrillo's Croco-Suit, created by Sir Tait Wilson.

Step B: Dr Will Spartalis gets into the sweat factory of a wetsuit covered in non-breathing green coloured house-paint, with assistance.


Stay tuned little squeaky baby crocodiles